Mass Effect: Wavering Fortitude
by Campbellim
Summary: A beat of music, the smell of a cigarette, the sound of a woman laughing in joy. A beat of music, the smell of burning flesh, the sound of a woman screaming in fear. A beat of music, the smell of a fuel, the Laughter of a friend. A beat of music, the smell of a forest fire, the scream of dying marines.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is the new version of A love for the end of everything. It's changed a lot, first off it now starts in ME1. I'm not going to explain the background of my FemShepard, as that is shown in this chapter. I will say this she is Paragon/Infiltrator. Please Review if you like, it really gets me motivated to continue. Even if there are problems please let me know.

Chapter 1: Beginnings

It always snowed on Mindoir this resulted in life on the colony to be incredibly difficult. Given the near constant blizzards that plague the surface of the world, combined with the extreme cold most organic life would freeze to death if not properly heated. This resulted in the colony on the world being a system of tubes connecting one habitat to another. It was a maze of tunnels and lights, but the seasoned Mindoir colonist could easily navigate, this went double for the children who were born and raised on Mindoir. The first habitat that was properly set up was a station for vegetation to grow unhindered by the freezing cold of the planet surface. This was created with a combination of heated ventaliation and a synthetic sun creating the appropriate level of light for photosynthesis to occur. Shortly after that homes were airdropped down and created to facilitate the colonists. It became apparent that the blizzards resulted in severe buffeting of the colony ships causing them to veer off target and be lost out in the cold. A total of thirty five colonists were lost in this manner.

Once the facility was properly situated the colony began to function as needed, teams were divised to handle to necessary details of the day to day; those being the hunt and mapping of Mindoir, by using a vehicle to properly protect the crew from the cold. As it became slowly apparent the hostility of the local wildlife, a Mako was used to protect the hunters, this became unnecessary as slowly the creatures learned to not attack the convoys. In the forty years that the colony had been standing they had mapped three fourths of the planet and had gone so far as found what wildlife was edible for which race. It seemed the planet actually housed more food for Turians then most planets this side of the Terminus systems. The export of Turian food became the main selling point of Mindoir and as such the colony became known as a hunter colony. This meant that most of the colonists were taught to handle a rifle and to kill the wildlife, to skin them, and then to package and prepare the meat pristinely. Most children learned to handle a pistol at the age of ten and were subsequently sent out on a hunt with their parents. The child would make their first kill and then be taught the S.P.P method, Skin, Prepare and Package. The pelt of their first kill would then be hung in their family's main hall as a symbol of their growth. When the child turned sixteen they'd be sent out once more this time with a sniper rifle, they had been given the year before, and once more they'd kill, two experienced hunters would join the Teen for this hunt. This was the coming of age ceremony for the Mindoir colonists, and it came early by human standards, but such was the life on the frontier.

Michelle Shepard smiled broadly as she felt the click of the rifle in her hand as the Rover shook on the rocky terrain around them. The snow was coming down lightly for once letting the three colonists fully enjoy the view of their home. It was a frozen, every inch covered in snow, mountains of white and rivers of ice dotted the area around them. Trees of snow leaves, born to leaf a gentle color of blue, like water reflected through strands of ice and snow. The leaves danced as soon landed upon their surface. Wind swept through the leaves tearing them from their branches and scattering them unto the frozen ground. Michelle felt a gloved hand grab at her jacket and she turned a hooded face to the person beside her. The beefy man beside her pointed forward at a small dot in the distance and Michelle raised the rifle to her shoulder. The Rovers see-through metal roof rolled back and cold nipped at the three. Michelle brought the scope to her masked face, her mask situating the visual so that she could get a full view of her target. A simple deer-like creature, at least that's how Captain Rick described the creatures. They were white with antlers, but the face held a sharp row of teeth the creatures would use to tear into the flesh of anything that had fallen to their gaze. Strong legs would carry them impossibly fast, going as fast as seventy miles per hour. The creature was feasting upon its own kind as Michelle lined up the shot. The creature turned and bounded away as a roaring entered the atmosphere. A ship was breaking through the atmosphere.

"What the fuck? Rick we expecting a drop today?" A woman's voice from the driver's seat spoke up.

"No. Michelle scoot over darling let me get a look at that ship." Rick said and Michelle switched places with the Captain and he brought his own rifle up to his shoulder. A gasp ripped through the stoic man's breath.

"That's no human vessel, it bears the colors of the Batarian hegemony. Get us back to the colony Jamie, double time." Rick said and the metal cover snapped back into place. The Rover was accelerating, turning on a dime and slightly losing control as Jamie gunned it back to the Colony. Smoke was rising from over the hill and the Rover slammed into an opening inbetween two hills. The Rover rocked hard as it was sent careening from a misalignment of the angle for entry. It stabilized and Jamie's left hand shot out hitting a button that opened the metal gate before them. No sooner had it opened had the Rover shot in and the gate closed behind them. The familiar music that played throughout the colony met Michelle's ears as she exited the vehicle. An explosion ripped through the garage sending the Rover she stood beside careening into the door they had just entered through. As the vehicle burnt a single person clambered out. It was Jamie, she had managed to get out and she staggered as blood poured from an open wound to her shoulder. Michelle ran to her, but a hand from Jamie alerted her to the situation behind her. Michelle turned and there standing before her was a Batarian. A fist lashed out connecting with Michelle's mask the mask fragmented, spewing glass into Michelle's delicate skin. Green eyes met the Batarian's as Michelle swung the rifle in her hands. It cracked the Batarian hard across the face sending the thing sprawling. No sooner had it fallen had Michelle pulled the skinning knife from her belt and jammed it roughly into the Batarian's head. Bile filled her mouth as she held back a vomit. She slowly swallowed it back down gagging at the taste. Jamie was at her side then.

"Michelle get to your home see if you can secure it, lock it down or just hide out. We just need to make it till the Alliance gets here. I'm checking on my family, and then I'll be right with you." Jamie said and she took off. Jamie was only eighteen, but she had proven herself to be an ace when it came to recon. In her first hunt she had been the one who had noticed the small dot on a hill. She had pointed to it and her parents drove to it. They had disabled the creature and Jamie had finished the kill. Jamie was a prodigy for the Mindoir colonists, every hunt she went on resulted in thousands of credits going the colonies ways. Her score weighted down the rover and made it a long journey home, but it was always worth it for the colony.

Michelle followed the orders of her senior and slowly made her way through the tunnels of the colony. She hid from the Batarians who were dragging her fellow colonists off into their ships. She knew if she stepped to save them, she'd be the next one to end up on their ship. The door to her families compound was blown open, debris littered the main hall. Panic filled her as she snuck her way through her home, no one was there. The Batarians had already claimed her family. Tears broke out on her face. She wanted to run wanted to get out of here, but she steeled herself. She pushed the couch against the wall and pulled at the ventilation shaft cover. Slowly it gave way and she pulled herself inside. She slammed the cover back into place and sat there watching the wall of her home. She sat there for hours, as explosions continued to rock the colony. The heat was still on which was good, as she'd freeze quickly without her mask.

"Michelle. You here?" A quiet voice in her room spoke up. It was Jamie. Michelle put her fingers through the metal bars of the ventilation cover and Jamie ran to them.

"Michelle, its not good here. The alliance isn't here yet, and most of the colony is taken. Scoot back I'm coming in there." Jamie said and Michelle pulled herself farther into the shaft. Jamie's hands shot to the cover.

"Put your hands down human and come here." A voice from the room spoke up. Jamie's eyes widened in fear as she stared at Michelle.

"I said come here human" the voice repeated. Michelle shook her head pleading with Jamie to just run, but Jamie did not listen. Her hands left the cover and she turned to the front door of Michelle's home. Slowly Jamie walked till Michelle could no longer see her. A scream filled the room followed by a dull thud as the Batarian must have struck Jamie. Tears welled in Michelle's eyes. She wanted to cry, wanted to scream, but she couldn't. Silence filled the colony, the explosions ceased and all Michelle could hear was the sound of ships breaking through the atmosphere. The Batarians must have left. Michelle pulled herself to the cover and broke it back out. She fell to the couch and ran. She ran trying to find any survivors. Dead eyes met her every corner, every home, dead men, and no women. Several Batarians dotted the colony but not enough to make any impact.

-Several Hours later-

Fear gripped Michelle's heart as the sound of a ship breaking through the atmosphere filled her once more. She waited and waited for a Batarian to come through to claim her. She brought her rifle to her shoulder and lined the scope up. She aimed at the one entrance to her home, and planned to take as many of the bastards as she could before she was claimed.

"L.T. Anderson, no one is here." A human female voice sounded out

"Keep looking, there has to be someone." Another voice spoke, this time human. Hope filled Michelle's heart followed by bitterness. She waited until one of the humans was in her scope and fired at the feet. The bullet dug into the fake dirt of the tunnel.

"What the fuck?" the same woman spoke up

"You're late Alliance. Everyone else is dead." Michelle shouted out and three human soldiers entered her home. She stood from behind the couch where she had been hiding and turned to face the humans.

"I see, we are very sorry about the delay miss. We got the S.O.S and came as fast as we could." The man from before spoke up

"Yeah yeah. Save it. Your excuses aren't going to bring anyone back." Michelle said bitterness flowing through her voice.

"Come on miss, we're getting you out of here." Anderson said and Michelle nodded, she wanted to demand that they went after the Batarians, but she had heard that these attacks happened and the Alliance couldn't do anything. Everytime they had demanded reparation from the Council, they had been told that that was the risk of settling in Terminus systems. She prayed that Jamie would be ok, but deep down she knew the terror she'd face. She swore she'd make the Batarians pay for what they did here, she swore she'd kill them with prejudice.

-Seven years Later Elysium-

Michelle giggled lightly as her best friend tickled her sides. Michelle had just passed N-7 training and had been given shore leave. She and Amanda decided to spend time on Elysium, as it was a beautiful garden planet. It had trees and great open forests. It was a far cry from the home she had grown up on. Here one could walk around without a hood and mask, one could run through toes through grass. Michelle smiled as Amanda pulled away from her. Black eyes met green.

Slowly they leaned in, a moment that would change their friendship, and yet it was something they both wanted. Michelle's hand grabbed at Amanda's dainty waist as Amanda followed in kind. Amanda's hand ran through Michelles red hair, their lips inches away from each other before they were interrupted by the sound of ships breaking through the atmosphere. Michelle's eyes widened in fear, memories of Mindoir played through her mind and Michelle was off. Running to her bunk to grab her sniper rifle. Explosions ripped through the sky as ships came tumbling down.

The Forests around the colony lit up in flames as Elysium burned. Michelle grabbed her rifle and made her way through the colony to a sniper perch. Her Mantis rifle secured to her shoulder and the scope to her eye. She pulled back a second to scout a target and found one, a batarian grabbing at a colonist who had not managed to get to the bunkers. Her gun fired piecing the Batarian's skull and the colonist ran.

She popped the clip and reloaded from the batch beside her. Her eyes roamed the colony; she could see her allies rallying against the Batarians. A grin came to her face, the Batarians made a mistake attacking Elysium it was a pure military relieve colony. All the colonists were either wives, husbands of marines, or marines themselves. The colony rebelled against the threat.

From her perch Michelle tuned into the military ground channel and began to make her orders. Her perch gave her access to the entire field. She made her calls stationing troops as best she could. Her gun picked Batarians off as they came from the burning forest. Slowly the ground team faltered from the onslaught, and soon she watched in fear, as she and a handful of others were all that protected the civilian bunker. The marines on the ground created a circle with her perch as the center. Her thermal clips were running low, but a runner had been sent to grab some from close bodies. A gunshot rang out and Michelle felt her body rock. The shot wasn't clean but it had torn into her left arm, making her aim slip, as she couldn't hold her rifle. She groaned as she bent down to protect herself from the next shot. More shots and screams filled the coms. Her marines had fallen. Michelle reached to the pistol on her waist and aimed it at the ladder. No Batarian would get through there. A head popped into her view, and she shot. Killing the Batarian. She could hear the Batarians below her working on opening the gate. Suddenly more gunfire and she heard the Batarians screaming. She pulled herself to the ladder and pushed the dead Batarian on the ladder off. She made out the symbol of the Alliance on the man standing below her perch. His masked face looked up at her and he tore his mask from himself. There before her was Captain Anderson, the man who had saved her on Mindoir.  
"We have got to stop meeting under these circumstances Captain." Michelle said with a grin. Anderson smiled up at her.

"Yeah well, imagine my surprise here I am picking up my new commander for my vessel and she's in a sniper perch with dead Batarians around her. Seriously Shepard do you just invite trouble upon yourself?" Anderson said a smile on his face

"Oh you know me the Batarians love me Captain." Michelle said before she slipped as she tried to climb down the ladder. Anderson reached out and caught her.

"Sorry sir, I'm a little dizzy." Michelle said before her eyes closed. She found herself being carried as her consciousness faded.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: So next chapter we will start right where Me1 starts.

Chapter 2 Star of Terra

Michelle Shepard sat uncomfortably in her Dress Blues, due to genetics she was considerably tall for a human woman, standing at six foot two. This was due to her father's and mothers statue, both of them standing at six foot. She was barely taller then they would have been had they still been alive. A part of her wished they could have been there to see her now, but a larger part of her hated that she sat on the stage being given accolades and having someone who had never spoken to her speak about her accomplishments in the academy and her past. The older man stood tall stating how her decisions on Elysium saved the colony, but in her heart she knew that the honest truth was her decisions resulted in seventy-nine marines dying. Her decisions killed her best friend before she could rationalize her budding feelings for the woman. Her decisions left her alive and everyone else dead. What was fair about that? She was given awards for living while the dead received none. They were forgotten in the wake of the attack. Soldiers went out to claim vengeance for the fallen and yet none of them knew the names of the departed. This man speaking didn't know their names, but Michelle did. She had personally gone out of her way to address letters to each of the dead's family stating that she was sorry for their loss, and that they were a hero. She wrote seventy-eight letters like that, before finally writing the letter to the parents of Amanda. She had apologized for causing the death of their only child. She apologized for bringing her into danger. She did not ask for them to forgive her, she knew she'd never forgive herself. She had failed all the training she had ever been given when she ran from Amanda on Elysium. Her greatest failure would be an award given to her. The Star of Terra, given to the bravest, most honorable Alliance soldiers. The Star of Terra a symbol of honor for Alliance soldiers, but for her it would be a symbol of her pain.

The man speaking turned to her and she stood. The Star of Terra was a small silver star with seven points. The man walked slowly to her, reverently pulled upon her dress blues so that he may place it upon the lapel over her right breast. A part of her wished to smack the man as his hands grazed her breast, but his focus was purely on the award. As soon as he placed it upon her he stepped back and saluted her, she returned the salute. There was no clapping, no cheers; no one sung her praises in that moment.

She turned and made her way down the long walkway that adorned the great hall she stood in. As she walked soldiers turned to face her, they saluted her as she walked. She left the System Alliance Hall in Vancouver; she made her way through the dark streets to the dock where the Normandy sat in rest. Her hands brushed the terminal that would give her access to the Normandy. A short scan later and she was walking through the Normandy. Her crewmates saluted her as she made her way to her bunk. She slept with the crew as Anderson had his own separate chamber.

She slept in the female crew chambers. There were only six female crewmembers, most of them were medical officers. As such the large female crew bunkroom was largely empty and each woman was given her own private section. Michelle's was separated from the rest by a drape that gave her privacy from the rest of the room. She slipped behind the drape and stripped herself of her dress blues. Her fingers drifted to a scar on her stomach; during training she had sustained injuries from an overzealous marine. He had hit her so roughly, and had accidently pushed his biotics into the punch, her armor had broken back and ripped into her body. She had sustained minor injuries, at least that's what the doctors said, but she learned from Dr. Chakwas that the armor had pierced one of her Fallopian tubes causing them to have to remove one of her ovaries and to stem the tube off. As such she had a single ovary. She did not mind that much, she could still bear children if she so chose, but it was not something Michelle truly wished for. Her fingers brushed over the scar before she turned to her dresser. She pulled on the middle drawer and pulled out a black t-shirt and a pair of jeans. She then reached to the chair on her desk that had her green towel draped over it. She threw it over her bare shoulder and reached for her shampoo and body-wash that was upon her desk. She turned and pulled the drape back across and made her way to the female shower, which was attached to the female bunks.

The sound of running water greeted her; she could make out from over on of the stalls the face of Dr. Chakwas. Her eyes were closed and a light tune was escaping her lips as she hummed to herself in the shower. Michelle made her way to the other side of the female showers before placing her towel on the bench behind her. She removed her white bra and panties sighing in relief as her breasts were freed from their confinement. She was not the bustiest woman in the crew, but she still was proud of her C-cup breasts. Not that anyone else had ever admired her form; she had spent most of her time training and had not had time for romances. The closest she had gotten to any romance was the near kiss with Amanda. It would have been her first kiss, and she missed that chance.

She stepped into her shower and turned the warm water on. The water rushed over her body warming her, her eyes closed and she could almost see Amanda standing next to her. A smile on her face as she commented on how Michelle always showered any chance she got. Michelle loved the feeling of water pouring over her body, she loved feeling her red hair cling to her skin as water rushed over it. She enjoyed being warm it was a different experience then when she was growing up. On Mindoir a warm shower was still cold, and the showers had to last only five minutes, barely enough time to fully wash ones body. As such when Michelle was able to sit and enjoy a shower she took her damn time. It wasn't unheard of for her to spend near an hour just enjoying the water burning her skin, of course she came out of the shower looking like a prune, but it was worth it for her. She ran her fingers through her red hair before reaching calmly for her shampoo. The ship lurched for a second as it prepared to take off. A call went through the ship.

"Commander Shepard, Anderson wishes to speak with you in the comm room." Joker's voice shot through the P.A. system. Michelle sighed before turning the water off. She dried her self off as best she could before stepping into her little privacy sector and dressing. She slipped on the standard rest clothes for a marine, it consisted of a near skin-tight suit that would be worn under the armor. She made her way through the ship her hair dripping water on her clothes. She had opted to slick her hair back so that she could regain some semblance of discipline. She steeled herself before she stepped into the comm room.

"-Kind of soldier we need." Anderson was saying to the man over the comm. The man bore resemblance to the human ambassador on the Citadel, but Michelle couldn't be sure as she had only met the man once.

"I'll make the call." The man responded before the comm turned off and Anderson turned to face her.

"So Shepard, how does it feel to receive the Star of Terra?"

"It's an honor sir." Michelle said stiffly a grin snuck its way onto Anderson's face at her response.

"Yes it is an honor, but every person I've known that has ever received it said they felt it was a shame they received it. They did not find the award to be something they deserved. They tried to find fault in their actions. Most of the time they came up short, but it didn't change the fact they felt they were wrong. So tell me Shepard how do you really feel?"

"Anderson, you already know how I feel. Seventy-nine soldiers are dead because of me."

"Three-hundred and forty six civilians are alive because of you."

"Anyone could have made the calls I did, and done it better."

"Shepard, we listened to the audio recordings of your orders on Elysium seven times before coming to the decision that you deserved it. Every admiral and Captain that listened agreed with your decisions. I would have done everything the exact same way you did, Shepard. Like it or not you deserve that award."

"Sir."

"It won't make things easier knowing you deserved the award, but hopefully you can rest easy knowing you were put in an impossible situation and made the best of it. Now as for why I called you here. We will be heading to the Citadel, there was a discovery on Eden Prime, we will be meeting a spectre there and take him to Eden Prime."

"Why would a Spectre need to come?"

"It's an important discovery Shepard. The discovery is one that has ripple effects throughout the galaxy. The Spectre is coming because the Citadel is interested in the find, and we are surrendering the find to the Citadel."

"If it's so important why aren't we just keeping it sir?"

"They are our allies Shepard they deserve to know we found a Prothean Beacon. I'm sure I don't need to explain the importance of these Beacons Shepard."

"No sir."

"Good, we'll be docking on the citadel in two days. Get some sleep. Tomorrow I expect you to eat with the crew. You've avoided them the last seven days you've been on this vessel. That ends now." Anderson said

"Sir yes sir." Shepard said and saluted her captain. Anderson saluted back and Shepard turned on her heel and walked out the hall. She slid her way through the corridors before she reentered her bunk. She thought for a moment about reshowering, but it was late and most of the offduty crew was already asleep. She had to be up at six and needed to make sure she was fully prepared for the day. She peeled the skintight suit off her body, took her bra off and grabbed the black tshirt she had left on her bed. She slid it over her head and crawled into her bed.

-Next day mess hall-

The day had gone slow for Michelle, she spent her time seated in the co-pilot chair. She enjoyed that particular spot, no one came to bother her and the pilot wasn't the most talkative guy. He seemed just as happy to sit and fly in silence as she did. The most conversation they had was when they had to navigate through the asteroid belt. That had been a little hectic as Joker had decided they had to actually fly through the center where it was more asteroids rotating in space then there were anywhere else in the belt. He had called it an adventure, she called it suicide. Michelle found herself seated on the far end of the mess hall. Around her the crew spoke to one another, but most seemed to avoid speaking to the Commander.

Her silence was interrupted by a man coming to sit across from her. He had black hair and black eyes he still wore his army regs. He must have just gotten off shift, and had come to eat. Michelle had been off duty for a few hours now and had managed to change into a jacket and pants. She still kept the jacket she wore when she was sixteen, it was small on her now, but she refused to not wear it whenever she could. It was a little tattered now, specially given the fact that it was stained in the front with blood from the cuts she received from her broken mask.

"So Commander, the crew and I heard of what happened on Elysium, but we'd like your story of it." The man said

"It was hell, short story. Batarians came we fought as best we could. I lived." Michelle said shortly she really did not want to talk about Elysium.

"Oh come on Commander, none of us have ever been in such a close situation, tell us how it felt.

"And I hope you never have to feel that way. It was hell. No matter how many Batarians we killed there were always more. Our heat sinks were low, and we were losing ground faster then ever before. If it wasn't for Captain Anderson I'd be dead right now. Not what you want to hear? You want to hear about how it was thrilling knowing we were protecting civilians? You want to know how good it felt killing the Batarians? Wake up, it wasn't easy. My best friend was on Elysium, she didn't make it." Michelle's voice began to raise louder and louder getting the attention of the crew. Another man slowly walked up and placed his food beside Michelle's.

"I'm sure Jenkins didn't mean to insult you Commander. He's just fresh blood. Just off training."

"Sorry Commander." Jenkins said looking down.

"Look Jenkins was it? It's not a game when you're out there. A close situation is just that, its the knowledge that at any moment a bullet could pierce your shields and connect firmly with your head." Michelle said before collecting her plate and depositing it before the mess sergeant. She then turned and made her way back to her bunk. She fixed her way to the showers and as water cleansed her sweaty body she felt bad for how she spoke to Jenkins. He was just trying to talk to her. Sure he made the wrong call in how he spoke to her, but she could have been kinder. She'd apologize to him later. A part of her wanted Amanda to be by her side once more, she always calmed her. Amanda could just place a hand on her and Michelle would relax, all the anger would just dissipate from her being. A lone tear slid down her cheek, hidden by the shower, but she knew she was crying. She missed Amanda, she missed Jamie, she missed her mom and dad. She just wanted to go to bed and wake up back in Mindoir, and know that everything was just a dream. She'd then decide she wanted to be a soldier, and she'd enter basic in Vancouver and bump into Amanda. They'd grow to be best friends once more, and she'd get that kiss this time. She'd live a happy life dating Amanda, get married and die old with Amanda at her side. She shook her head banishing the thoughts. Tears continued to trek down her cheeks and she allowed herself to cry silently long into the night.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: So I decided to add Miranda into the story early. I do like her as a character. I think adding her now will make the whole Project Lazarus dig harder for Shepard. Also Shepard is surprisingly ok with project Lazarus in the game... She's like oh I was dead now I'm not. I'm ok. If you romance Liara you get the biggest bullshit response in LOTSB... Shepard disregards the fact she was dead and is like eh lets get back together easily. Like it's simple and then there's the "Blue children." response. I hate that comment... It is such a throw away line and i suppose it's logical for someone to want to say that as a joke, but still...

Chapter 3: Romanov

Miranda smiled lightly as she perused the information regarding his sisters new home. She had been situated in a reasonably safe location on Ilium. It was unlikely her father would find her anytime soon, but it was still possible. She'd keep her own men watching over her sister and making sure her father's men didn't get anywhere near her. She ran a hand through her long black hair leaning back into the leather chair of her own private ship. Cerberus had long since employed her as a cleaner for rogue cells. Her most recent call had her engineering a raid on a certain escaped failed experiments hideout. Her target was now safely behind bars in the Purgatory division. Of course Cerberus had donated money to the Prison Ship so that if they ever needed to turn the experiment loose they could easily do so. A small blip on her monitor alerted her to an incoming call from her employer. She answered it and found herself seated infront of The Illusive Man.

"Miranda our contact in the Ambassador's office has notified us that he is making a play for a Human Spectre. It seems very likely it will go through this time. We need an operative on the Spectre's vessel. You'll be headed to the Citadel where Donnel Udina will be awaiting you. He will set you up with documentation for your new identity. The vessel the human Spectre candidate is on is the Normandy. When the vessel inevitably lands upon the Citadel you will find a way to worm yourself onto the crew."  
"What of the Human Spectre? Who is he?"

"She is an N-7 soldier. Michelle Shepard grew up on Mindoir and served during the battle on Elysium. She was deemed a hero for her actions on Elysium. She has also become something of an icon for colonists, since her name and past went public Colonists have flocked to joining the Alliance."

"I see."

"I trust you can find a way to turn her to our side. She could be valuable." The Illusive Man said

"Of course, sir."

"See to it Miranda." The illusive man said before the call cut out. Miranda sighed as she turned her attention to the controls of her ship. It'd be a long journey to the Citadel, but duty called.

-Normandy-

"Drift just under 1500" Joker said pride filling his voice as he related the approach towards Eden Prime. A slight nod from his co-pilot Kaidan Alenko was his first acknowledgement the second came from the Spectre behind him.

"1500 is good, your Captain will be pleased." The Turian Spectre said and he turned to leave the bridge. Michelle took the Spectre's place her hand gently landing on Joker's shoulder.

"I hate that guy." Joker said

"Nihlus paid you a compliment so you hate him?" Kaidan said confused.

"You remember to zip up your suit after taking a piss that's good. I just jumped us halfway across the Galaxy and hit a target the size of a pinpoint. So that's incredible. Besides Spectre's are trouble. I don't like having him on board. Call me paranoid."

"You're paranoid, the council helped fund this project they are entitled to check on their investment."

"Nah Joker's right. They don't send Spectres for pick up runs this sounds like trouble." Michelle said

"See the Commander knows what's up."

"Joker, send Commander Shepard to the comm room please." Anderson's voice sprung up on the voice comms."

"She's on her way Captain. Be careful Nihlus is on his way."

"He's already here." Anderson said before the comm closed and Michelle turned on her heel and made her way down the Galaxy map

-Miranda-

Miranda stripped herself of all clothes pertaining to Cerberus this would be a mission she'd have to go undercover for. She thumbed through the dossier on Michelle Shepard that the Illusive Man had sent her. It was a collection of her record scores in the N-7 program, her military commendations on Elysium, but it did not give her a way to convince the candidate that she'd be the right choice to join her crew. The only thing she knew from the dossier was that this was someone who could in fact become the first Human Spectre.

-Eden prime-

The mission had gone to hell, the Normandy had gotten a call stating that Eden Prime was under attack and from there things had taken off. Michelle had jumped onto Eden Prime ground with nothing but two other marines at her back. Jenkins the one she had shouted at not three days back, and Kaiden Alenko a biotic. She couldn't say she knew these two very well, but Kaiden was well spoken of in the crew. She hadn't gotten around to apologizing to Jenkins yet, but she promised herself after the mission she'd apologize. A grin snuck onto her face as she listened to Jenkins speak of how beautiful Eden Prime once was. It reminded her of how she saw Mindoir in her sleep. The rolling hills of snow, the caress of that cold on her skin. All that she ever wanted was in the snow of Mindoir. She had lost it to the Batarians, she'd make sure Jenkins did not lose his home. No one else would die under her watch she promised herself. Her attention was pulled back to the present when the sight of a burned body peaked her interest. It was still burning lightly, meaning that it had only recently been burnt. Chances were that the ones who burnt the body may still be here. She signaled her team to get behind cover. Jenkins ran forward to get behind a rock in the clearing. As he ran several drones fired him upon. Kaiden and Michelle jumped into action the drones were quickly taken down. Michelle felt tears prickle in her eyes as she took care of the drones. She'd never get the chance to apologize to the young private. She'd never get to be something other then that bitch who yelled at him for no reason. What made it so much worse was that she found herself not caring much that he was dead. She was more upset about how the crew would look at her now that she had treated someone poorly and then got him killed.

"Come on Lieutenant, we gotta go." Michelle said steeling herself for the mission ahead.

-On the way to the Citadel-

The mission had surely gone to hell, she had lost the beacon, lost Jenkins, and lost Nihlus. A total flop, and now she had to go report to the council about how some Spectre was planning the annihilation of the human race. Michelle was pretty sure that it'd go incredibly poorly. Most likely she'd lose her candidacy for Spectre and then her entire race would be destroyed. She hated the feeling of uselessness. She had ignored all summons from her Captain after she awoke. She just made her way to her bunk and sunk into her bed. It wasn't a comfortable bed but she had gotten used to it.

-Citadel-

Miranda sighed she had gotten her new documents; her new name was Natasha Romanov. She was supposed to be some woman who was adopted by a Russian couple who couldn't have children. Her back-story was that she had turned to being a Bounty Hunter after some random criminal had killed her father and mother. She was supposed to have hunted after the criminal and found some thrill in the hunt. It wasn't a foolproof back-story, but she could make it work perfectly. Donnel Udina had sent confirmation that Shepard and her team would be moving towards Chora's Den shortly. It was a seedy place but one she could work with. She was only a short jog from it and she took off. In the distance she could hear gunfire. She turned the corner to see a red haired woman standing beside two dark haired soldiers. A small team of Turians was firing upon the trio. Miranda smiled, this was an easy way in. She pulled on the gun on her waist, and she waited until one of the Turians popped out of cover and fired. The bullet dropped the Turians shields and the next shot from the red-haired woman killed the Turian. When the last Turian fell Shepard and her team turned to face Miranda.

"Thanks for the assist. Who are you?" Michelle said pointing her gun at the woman before her. Miranda quickly holstered her gun and held her hands at the level of her eyes.

"Natasha Romanov. I do work for people willing to hire my services." Miranda said with a smile

"A mercenary? Lowlife." The woman beside Michelle spoke up

"I have a rule. You give me concrete reason why your target needs to taken care of, I will. You give me a cause that can save lives; you have a gun at your side. You give me a good reason and I will stand at your six and take bullets for you." Miranda said slowly sauntering over towards Michelle. She made sure to sway her hips a bit more then normal as the man next to her target stared. If she could get the man to stop thinking rationally she'd be able to use him to convince Shepard.

"Now the question is Ms. N-7, why were these boys after you?"

"An N-7 always has enemies."

"Clearly, but those enemies are typically Batarians not Turians." Miranda said before she started to lean against the railing beside Michelle. She was acutely aware of the glance Michelle spared to her backside. A grin came to her face.

"Well I seem to cause trouble." Michelle said

"Oh a bad-girl eh? I like that. So tell me N-7, you are attacking by Turians infront of Chora's Den. Coming here for some recreation? Or Business?" Miranda said

"Business."

"Oh and what could bring you here for business? If it's in anyway related to these Turians it must be pretty big. I could help if you want."

"Why would you help us?" Ashley said

"I'm a sucker for a pretty girl in distress." Miranda said with a wink at Michelle.

"If you can help us we'll take it." Michelle said lightly. She wasn't quite sure how to act with the woman before her. She had never had someone be as openly flirty with her as the woman before her was being. She couldn't say she hated it, but it definitely made her uncomfortable.

"Good, now then what is your name? I'd like to call you something more then just N-7 woman." Miranda said holding her hand.

"Commander Michelle Shepard." Michelle said shaking the outstretched hand.

"Kaide-"

"A pleasure Commander. Now then what's the plan who are you going after?" Miranda said interrupting Kaiden. She ran a hand across Michelle's waist as she turned to cross the bridge to Chora's Den. She could feel eyes on her as she swayed her hips once more.

"You're staring." Ashley ground out lowly

"Sorry." Kaiden and Michelle spoke up. The pair looked at each other in shock before Ashley growled lightly and followed after Miranda. There was an awkward silence before Michelle followed after Ashley. Kaiden stood there in silence for a moment before shaking his head. He turned to follow his Commander.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: So I won't be using Miranda's new name in narration, but I will when someone talks about her (that doesn't know her real name). I also decided to skip a lot of the wandering around on Citadel to get the spectre status. It doesn't have a lot of impact on the story, and I don't want to focus on what you already know happens. Nothing changes in that first mission despite Miranda being present (Though I did write it out and add some little comments by Miranda, but it wasn't substantial or important enough to the story.

Now if you read Eternal love and this one you'll probably be annoyed by how I present the two Shepards. (Male Shepard has things more together then Female Shepard) This is because Male Shepard is normal age for Shepard in the games (29) while FemShep is six years younger (23). Also for FemShep Elysium was around a week ago. So while she's off being the first human Spectre there's the whole revenge trip going on (Torfan hasn't happened).

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Chapter 4:Therum

Michelle stepped into her new quarters with trepidation. It didn't feel right by her to take the Captain's quarters. She had just joined the crew, had killed one of their crewmates, and now was taking the captain's place. It was just a situation ripe for mistrust within the crew. She wouldn't be surprised if the human crew was most likely to disregard her orders. She was pretty sure the entire human crew hated her, well except Joker. Michelle's fingers brushed gently over the boxes that had her stuff in them, she didn't have much really, some clothes, books and essentials. The only things she had from her old life were her bloody jacket and a small picture in a frame. The picture was of her family; it was on her sixteenth birthday. Moments after that picture was taken she had gone on her hunt, moments later her parents where missing or dead. Her fingers traced the picture on her desk. Her fingers gently touching her mother's cheeks, a desire to kiss her mother's cheek once more filled her. She wanted to hear her dad offer his council on the situation, wanted to hear him quote some old poet stating that the words of our ancestors still translate to today's day and age. She ignored the boxes for now and opted to use her private shower. She had already set the course to Therum and would be arriving in twelve hours. For now she'd just enjoy the gentle water on her body and get some sleep before she met this Dr. T'Soni.

-Therum Excavation Site-

The mission was rather simple get in go find a archaeologist and see if she knew any information on the Matriarch in Saren's pocket. Of course when Michelle noticed the large amounts of Geth she was certain that they were protecting the archaeologist and that they were being led to one of Saren's accomplices. She had her team of Garrus and Ashley be prepared to take the Doctor down if it came to that. After clearing a colossus at the excavation site the trio entered the small tunnel that served as the entrance to the tunnel. The passage was a little rickety as the catwalks creaked under their feet and the Geth filled the caverns. Finally the elevator had managed to break down with them inside it, they managed to get out before it plummeted farther down and broke apart below them.

"Hello out there?" A panicked voice rang out in the cavern. Michelle looked around unable to find the source of the voice. She shouldered her sniper rifle and made her way down the stairs to her left. As soon as her foot touched the ground the voice called out again.

"Hello? Human? I'm over here. Help me." Michelle's voice turned to the right where an Asari stood floating in a blue bubble. The bubble cast a glow on the woman's skin making her appear to be a very dark blue.

"Dr. T'Soni?" Michelle said

"Yes? Look I don't know who you are but can you please get me out before those Geth return. Yes there's Geth here I saw them. I know you might not believe that, but it's true. Geth beyond the veil."

"Slow down doctor, we know there are Geth here. They were most likely sent here by Saren and his accomplice Matriarch Benezia." Michelle said raising her left hand up

"My mother? Why would she send Geth after me?"

"We were hoping you'd tell us."

"I haven't spoken to my mother in decades. I have no idea why she would send Geth after me." Liara said. Michelle stared at the Asari before her. There was a strength in the woman's eyes that made Michelle want to believe her. She could see the emotions rumbling beneath the Asari's skin, but the woman before her kept them bottled. For a moment Michelle wasn't staring at the Prothean enthusiast but was instead staring at Jamie. She felt her heart ache and she had to turn away, her attention turned to a console next to T'Soni.

"That the control to the bubble you're in?"

"Yes, you'll have to get around to this side to get me out. Please hurry there was a Krogan here earlier. He made it clear he'd get to me, some of his suggestions were not pleasant."

"Hang tight, we'll get you out of there." Michelle said turning away so that she could smirk without being noticed. Her attention turned to rather large mining laser just in front of her.

"Tali, get us access to the laser." Michelle said and Tali ran forward. Suddenly she screamed in pain as a bullet ripped through her shields and tore at her shoulder. She fell to the ground, and Garrus sprung into action. He rose his sniper rifle to his eye and clocked the Geth that had shot Tali in the optics. Michelle opted to activate her cloak before running forward. She ran until she was directly behind the sniper Geth. She placed a hand on the wires in the back of its head before placing a leg on the Geth's back. She then pulled on it roughly until the wire broke out of the Geth and it collapsed to the ground. She stumbled back to her feet and shot the Geth before returning to Tali.

Tali was on the ground bleeding profusely, Garrus had covered the wound with his hands attempting to stem the bleeding as best he could. He looked up to Michelle as she neared him.

"Tali won't bleed out Commander, but we are going to have to make a run to the Citadel as soon as we can. Dr. Chakwas won't have enough amino-dextro antibiotics to deal with an infection from this wound." Garrus rattled off as Tali screamed in pain as Garrus put more pressure on the wound.

"I know it hurts Tali, but we need to stop the bleeding." Garrus whispered lifting one hand and placing it on the side of Tali's mask. He then returned to the wound. Michelle's hands curled to fists as she turned to the laser. She should have checked the area again, Amanda would have had her ass for that mistake. Her mistake cost Tali, her mistake cost Jenkin's his life, how many more would die because of her mistakes. She shook her head before turning to the console. It was fairly easy to get the laser working once more, and it made quick work of the ground beneath the structure Liara was in. Michelle walked past Garrus and down the hole in the ground.

A shriek from Tali alerted Michelle that Garrus was moving her along with them. She turned her head to see Garrus carrying Tali in his arms, he had placed one of her hands over the wound and was whispering to her. His voice was coming through the comms, and it broke Michelle's heart to hear him telling her that things were going to be ok. He wouldn't have to do that if she hadn't screwed up. Soon they were standing behind the Asari they had come to find.

"Dr. T'Soni, do you know how to get out of this?"

"I believe so, I think it's the lit up green button, but that might not be the case. I can't read prothean perfectly yet, and the words for release and explosion have similar styles. So the green is either release or sets off a self destruct system." Liara spoke quickly.

"Alright, well then. Here goes nothing." Michelle said pressing the switch and the bubble surrounding Liara shuttered before shattering and dropping her onto the ground. She staggered to her feet. Michelle reached down grabbing the Asari's hand and pulling her up.

"Thank you. May I ask my rescuer's name?" Liara said a grin on her face at the blush that set upon Michelle's face.

"Oh uh right, I'm Commander Michelle Shepard of the Normandy and first human Spectre. This is Garrus Vakarian, and Tali'zorah Nar Rayya." Michelle said pointing to the pair behind her.

"Uh Shepard, not to rush you but Tali needs medical attention badly." Garrus spoke his voice tinted with concern, at least that's what Michelle believed it to be.

"Right, do you know the way out of here Dr. T'Soni?"

"Please just call me Liara, and yeah I know the way, this whole center platform is an elevator. It can take us to the main floor quite quickly." Liara said and she stepped to the console in the center of the room. Garrus placed Tali down on the floor behind the console. He then bent down placing his hand on the Tali's back.

"No exit wound, the bullet is still in her." Garrus said somberly. He then reached into his suit before pulling out a flask. He popped the top open before splashing the liquid over his hands.

"This isn't going to be perfectly sanitary, but we need to get that bullet out." Garrus mumbled before he pushed a long claw into the bullet wound. Tali screamed in pain as Garrus' claws extended the wound in her shoulder. He then put two claws in and began to twist slightly. Tali stopped screaming in pain as her head drooped to the right. The cavern shook loudly.

"What was that?" Garrus called as his hands shook in the wound.

"The laser must have aggravated the lava pit beneath the cavern." Liara said

"Shit we need an exit plan, and I can't work on Tali with this shaking." Garrus said pulling his claws out, they were drenched in dark red blood, there was a slight sparkle in his fingers. He dropped the object onto the ground and it clanged loudly against the metal. The elevator came to a stop. Michelle switched her comms to the Normandy's channel before speaking.

"Joker we need an evac at our location now! We have wounded, tell Chakwas to prepare a sanitation room." Michelle shouted.

"Aye, aye Commander. Evac en route, eight minutes." Joker said his voice stern.

Liara gasped before ducking under the controls as a shot rang out. Michelle's attention turned to the Krogan standing at the exit tunnel.

"Hand over the Asari, and maybe I'll let you out with your lives." The Krogan said

"How about no?" Michelle said before her cloak activated and her omniblade extended from her arm.

She ran forward as Liara erected a barrier around Garrus and Tali. Liara had then stepped out of the barrier, her biotics flaring. Michelle ran forwards at the Krogan who had turned his attention the barrier. His shotgun rocking the barrier and making it fluctuate wildly. Michelle ran behind him before jumping onto his back. Her cloak dissipated as she dug her omniblade deep into the Krogan's brain. He still had the strength in his system to grab the human off his back before tossing her. No sooner had the Krogan grabbed her had she reached for her pistol with her nondominant hand. She smiled as he threw her over his shoulder. She waited until her gun was level with the Krogan's left eye before firing again. The Krogan fell to the floor dead. Michelle turned her attention back to the room and was shocked to find that the Geth had been dealt with by Liara.

"Come on we need to move now." Michelle shouted and Garrus bent down once more lifting the unconscious Tali into his arms.

They ran as fast as they could. The cavern shook and parts of the catwalk broke apart, once or twice Michelle stumbled as she took up the back of the run. As soon as they managed to get out of the tunnel the Normandy made it's presence known on the volatile ground. Lava streamed out of the pits around them burning at their armor as they ran. They climbed the small hill beside them and ran into the Normandy's opened drop-hatch. Garrus took the longest time to do so as he slid slightly on the blood that was dripping from Tali's wound. As soon as Garrus had touched onto the Normandy Dr. Chakwas and several medical team came running forward. They laid Tali out on a stretcher and took her off into the Med-Bay. Liara stepped next to Michelle and bowed her head slightly.

"I am sorry Commander Shepard. It was not my intention for a member of your crew to become injured on my account." Liara spoke quietly

"You aren't to blame." Michelle said her hands clenching and unclenching at her waist.

"Forgive me if I am being presumptious Commander Shepard, but neither are you." Liara said before placing a hand on Michelle's and uncurling the fist she had made. Heat flooded Michelle's cheeks at the Asari's touch. Michelle shook her head before stepping forward to where Garrus was. He was stripping the outer layer of his armor off.

"Garrus when you are done come up to the comm room." Michelle said before turning to Liara.

"Come on you're coming to the comm room to Dr. T'Soni. We need to know exactly why your mother would be coming after you."

"I do-"

"I'm sure you have no idea why Doctor, but you need to say it infront of the crew." Michelle stated. She hoped Liara would understand, she needed the crew to question and to harass the Asari so that she could prove her innocence. Michelle truly believed Liara had no idea, but she couldn't just give her free reign without inviting unrest with in the crew. Given the current situation she needed her crew to trust that she could take care of things. She turned away from Liara and she walked to the elevator. Liara slipped in beside her and they began their silent trek to the comm room.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Michelle walked into the debriefing room of the Normandy with Liara following her closer. She could still feel Liara's warmth on her hand as she walked to the middle of the room. Liara found a spot next to where Kaiden was sitting and with a slight nod of her head she sat down. Garrus slipped in behind her, his armor had been removed and he had opted to wear a blue shirt with a red stripe down the center. Michelle closed her eyes for a moment as all eyes landed on her. She went over the mission in her head hoping she could remember the details her crew truly needed to know.

"We will be heading back to the citadel to deal with the injury Tali'zorah nar Rayya received on this mission. Let this be known that the Geth can confuse your sensors. Do not rely solely upon them, this was the pitfall that cost Tali. From now on you rely on your vision first, do not hope an area is clear until every nook and crany has been checked. Now then." Michelle stated walking forward to where Liara sat.

"This is Doctor Liara T'Soni. Daughter of Matriarch Benezia. As of right now it is clear she has no alliance to Saren as of this time."

"How can you be sure? I mean Asari tend to put a lot of blind faith in their Matriarchs." Miranda stated from her spot next to Garrus.

"The Geth were there to kill me or to take me to my mother. Besides I have not seen my mother in forty years." Liara said indignantly

"Forty years? How old are you Doctor?" Ashley said from next to Miranda

"I am only a hundred and six."

"Damn I wish I look that good when I'm that age."

"It may seem a long time for a shortlived species like yours, but for Asari I am barely more then a child. It is for this reason a lot of my research has been looked down upon."

"Research?"

"Oh I assumed you knew given that you knew I was a Doctor. I am an archaeologist with a major focus on the Protheaen extinction. I am under the impression that the Protheaens did not just die off, but instead were eliminated by some other species that our archaeologist have not yet found. It would seem that someone erased all records of what happened to the Protheaens. It would also appear that this has happened several times before, if my research is correct the Protheaens rose to their greatness by standing on the shoulders of the giants that came before them."

"They were destroyed by a race of sentient machines known as the Reapers."

"How would you know that?"

"There was a beacon on Eden Prime, it imparted a broken fragment of what happened to the Protheaens."

"I see. Eden Prime was attacked by Geth. The Geth if you are correct are working for Saren, they'd want that information for themselves, but why? Why would Saren want to hide the information of what happened to the Protheaen?"

"According to an audio clip recovered by Tali, Saren is working for the reapers."

"I see." Michelle informed Liara

"So Saren's plan is to destroy all galactic civilization? Not just humanity?" Kaiden said

"That much is apparent." Garrus said gruffly. His mandibles flared in anger as the thought of one of the most respected Turians, being the vanguard for the destruction of all life. Liara began to sway slightly before shaking her head.

"I am sorry Commander, but is there somewhere I can lay down? I was stuck in the bubble for two days before you found me."

"Med-bay is currently on lockdown as Dr. Chakwas looks after Tali. You'll be in my quarters resting for now."

"Oh I could not take your quarters Commander!"

"You can and you will, Ashley take Dr. T'soni down to my quarters make sure she lays down." Michelle said and Ashley begrudgingly nodded. Liara made to protest, but as she stood she stumbled and had to be held up by Michelle.

"I will be out of your room as soon as I can Commander." Liara whispered her eyes drooping as sleep threatened to claim her.

"Lets go Doctor." Ashley said gruffly. Liara struggled to stand on her own and stumbled out the door with Ashley following closely.

"Dismissed. Wrex I'd like to speak to you for a moment." Michelle said and the ground crew slipped out the room. Wrex stood up towering over the six foot two human Spectre.

"What do you need Shepard?"

"Can you stand guard over my room while Dr. T'soni is in it? There is a chance she may be lying to us and is actually working for Saren. If that is the case I don't think any of us could stop her initial attack faster then you could."

"You want me to play bodyguard?" Wrex growled out stepping closer to Michelle. Michelle stood her ground meeting the Krogan's eyes.

"I swore to you I'd lead you to a good fight. That little doctor is the daughter of Matriarch Benezia. According to what I learned of Benezia, she is one of the strongest biotics of the Matriarchs of Thessia. If Liara T'Soni is half the biotic her mother is she could possibly tear a hole in the hull of the Normandy. I want you there to kill her should her biotics even flare for a moment." Michelle said. Wrex stared at her for a moment.  
"I see. The Med-bay isn't actually unavailable is it? You sent her to your quarters where she'd be isolated. Your quarters are also one of the only parts of this ship that can only be unlocked by you. It is also the quietest part of the ship and if she is not working with Saren she'd appreciate the nicer bed along with the quiet. Smart Shepard." Wrex said clasping a hand on Michelle's back. She buckled slightly under the weight before Wrex too left the room.

"Reports are filed and away Commander. Would you like me to patch you into the council?"

"Yes. Patch me in Joker." Michelle said before stepping to the center of the room. There was a moment of silence as the Council was hailed.

"We understand you have Dr. T'Soni on your ship now Spectre. You sure that's wise?" Tevos said gently

"We have no reason as of now to completely distrust her. The Geth appeared to be after her, but we have our resident Krogan watching over the room she is in. He's told to kill her if her biotics spark for even a moment. It is unlikely she'd be able to do significant damage before he brought her down."

"You are coming around to the Citadel correct?" Valern said

"Yes, we need more equipment to deal with the injury Tali'zorah Nar Rayya sustained."

"Yes injuries she received due to your incompetence." Sparatus said angrily.

"The Geth managed to hack my sensors and I was unable to know if they were there or not. As it stands the Geth had managed to sneak up on the colony on Eden Prime despite the marines standing at attention there."

"Yes another mistake of humans."

"You know Sparatus I did some research on who backed Saren. It was you Sparatus. Look at him now, a criminal who may just be looking to eradicate the entire Human species. You really want to talk about mistakes Councilor?" Michelle ground out

"Watch your ton-"

"That is enough Councilor. You are in the wrong here, do not make the situation worse. I doubt any of us here have lived their lives without ever making a mistake. When you do arrive on the Citadel Spectre please bring Dr. T'Soni to the Asari embassy. I will have a team of Commandos escort you there."

"Why do you want her there?" Michelle asked concerned. She did not like the idea of escorting a potentially dangerous Asari all the way through the Presidium for a simple social call.

"We will verify if she is infact working for Saren or not." Tevos said

"I see."

"About your last mission, was it entirely necessary to destroy a major Protheaen ruin Spectre?" Valern said

"The destruction of the ruin was as I stated in the report an accident brought about by the necessity of hurried access to Liara T'Soni. If we had not used the mining laser to get to Liara T'Soni, chances are she'd be in the hands of Saren right now."

"I see."

"Still-" Sparatus spoke up

"That'll be all Spectre, we will speak with you again as soon as a lead on Saren makes itself known." Valern said and the comm was shut down.

Michelle sighed as the council blipped out of sight. It'd take Joker another seven hours to fully get to the Citadel and unfortunately Michelle could not pass the time by sleeping as she had done on the way to Therum.

"Commander, Dr. Chakwas has called for you down by med-bay." Joker's voice rang out.

She left the comm room and made her way down to the Med-bay. Her eyes widened as she saw the whole ground crew, minus Wrex standing looking in on where Tali was being worked on. A white sheet covered their view, but they could see the silhouettes of the medical staff. One of the staff was making her way out the door, and with a hiss the door to the Med-Bay opened and out stepped Dr. Chakwas in full white clothing, Blue blood splattered the doctors clothes as she stepped forward to Michelle.

"We have found several pieces of the bullet in her shoulder, it seems the bullet broke apart inside her, luckily it didn't seem to travel far within her body. There is severe trauma to the muscles in the shoulder, and if I am correct she will never have full range of motion in that arm again. It won't prevent her from her work, but she will not be able to extend the arm fully, so pistols are something she can no longer use. On top of this she has lost a lot of blood, and I can't supply her with any Quarian blood so as of now we are keeping her alive purely by the machines. She has barely enough blood as it is. For right now she cannot move, cannot speak and is to not be disturbed for any reason. We will keep her heavily sedated and hope that the infection doesn't spread to much more before we arrive at the Citadel. As it is Commander we are racing against the clock." Dr. Chakwas reported. The ground crew stood in shock at the extent of the situation with Tali'zorah Nar Rayya. Michelle nodded her head and Dr. Chakwas turned on her heel and reentered the Med-Bay.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N:This Chapter was originally going to be longer, but I decided to cut it short. There is still a lot that will happen on the Citadel.

Chapter 6:

Liara sighed as the door to the Commander's chambers closed, it felt wrong by her to be in this room. This was her savior's private quarters, a spot for the Commander to relax, and here she was invading it. Her eyes glossed over the room noting the boxes on the floor, it was apparent the Commander hadn't fully moved in to the room yet. A picture frame on the Commander's desk caught her attention. There was a young woman who bore resemblance to the woman she had just met being held by two people Liara assumed to be the Spectre's mother and father. Liara walked to the desk and stared at the picture in silence; there was an light-heartedness in the young commander's eyes that did not mirror the haunted look she now possessed.

It made Liara concerned as to what exactly happened to the woman to make her look like that now. Liara turned on her omnitool and began to do a search on the commander.

One link attracted the Asari's attention it was labeled _The Naked Truth of the First Human Spectre_. She opened the link and was immediately assaulted by a full body image of a naked Michelle Shepard. Liara's eyes darted quickly through the picture taking in the woman despite the shame creeping into Liara's mind. It wasn't until she had peeled her eyes from the pink nipples resting on the Commander's chest that Liara noticed something odd about the image. The location the Commander was at was not somewhere any self respecting Alliance Soldier would be naked. It appeared that Michelle Shepard was naked kneeling with her arms thrust above her head in the middle of the Council Tower. Liara scrolled down away from the image hoping that maybe there'd be actual words listing a biography of the Commander. She instead found picture after picture of Michelle naked in some random spot. At the very bottom was a video that popped up without Liara's bidding. It revealed a woman who looked eerily similar to Michelle Shepard taking her clothes off and servicing a large group of men. Liara stared at the image in pure shock until the woman spoke. It was not Michelle's voice. Liara's eyes widened before she closed the popup as well as the extranet link. Liara found herself uncomfortable, as her arousal was made known by the wetness in her panties. Liara shifted uncomfortably before once again looking for information on the Commander, information that this time was hopefully not all lies.

She was much more careful about how she looked and instead opted to search for the Alliance main site. From there she looked up the Commander's name. This resulted in a long description of her scores in the Academy, along with a short biography of her premilitary life. The main focus of the link on Michelle was about Elysium. Liara read about the Commander with a hunger that she had only felt when studying the Protheaens. She needed to know about this woman, and most of all she needed to know about this Mindoir situation.

It was relatively difficult for Liara to find out what happened on Mindoir, or rather how it directly related to Michelle. After hunting around and looking through back paths in the Alliance database she found a singular video. The video was of a young Michelle Shepard sitting at a table as an Alliance Officer spoke to her. They spoke of what happened on Mindoir, and despite the cruelty of having the woman repeat the horror the Officer did not budge. Michelle repeated the names of each and every woman that was taken like one would read a grocery list. There was a sad detachment to how she spoke that made Liara's heart ache for the child before her. It was at that moment that the announcement that they were arriving on the Citadel came through. The door to the chamber's opened and Liara looked up seeing the Commander before her.

"You are supposed to be resting Dr. T'Soni." The Commander said gently

"I couldn't sleep, to much going on in my head." Liara admitted

"T'Soni, you need to sleep." Michelle sighed

"As it is we are taking you onto the Citadel. The Asari councilor would like to speak with you. I want you to relax when we get out of the Normandy, there's going to be a team of Commandos waiting for us." Michelle informed

"I see. The councilor is concerned I'm lying isn't she?"

"Couldn't say." Michelle stated turning away from Liara

"It's understandable if she is. She needn't worry though. I will not do a thing"

"Come on Dr. T'Soni. We shouldn't keep the councilor waiting."

"Of course. I thought I asked you to call me Liara?" Liara said a grin slipping onto her face as Michelle refused to make eye contact. Liara was thoroughly convinced the blushing woman before her was not the woman naked in those images she found.

Michelle just walked out the door and Liara followed her closely. When she saw the large Krogan standing right outside the room her eyes widened slightly. She was sure the Krogan was annoyed with her, and the way his hand shot to the shotgun at his back made clear his intention.

"Wrex, come on. You're coming with us." Michelle stated without even turning to the Krogan. For a moment Liara was sure the Krogan would refuse, but instead the Krogan's hand was off his shotgun and he was looking at Shepard.

"Sure Shepard." The Krogan, Wrex said. Liara's eyes widened this woman stopped a Krogan from his kneejerk reaction with just a sentence. She didn't even threaten the Krogan, she just spoke so calmly and the Krogan listened. Even Liara's mother wasn't capable of that. Liara's eyes darted to Michelle's back and a singular desire burnt in her mind, she wanted to stand by this woman's side as an equal.

Michelle led the trio up the stairs and out of the Normandy to the Docking Bay where a squad of fifteen Asari Commandos stood waiting for them. The Asari Commandos each bore the same markings a white curve around their eyes; they also bore white upon their upper lip with a white stripe going down from the middle of their bottom lip to their chin. A single Asari came up, this one did not bear the lip markings she stopped before the Commander and held out her hands palms up and she was bent to one knee.

"Spectre, I am Huntress Irissa. Councilor Tevos is awaiting you and the traitor. The Commandos here will strap the Traitor with biotic suppressing cuffs and we will be on our way" The Asari said and Liara's breath hitched. Michelle stepped forward and bent grabbing at the Asari's black armor. She pulled the woman to her legs in a rare show of physical prowess. The Huntress eyes widened at the gesture, no Asari would dare pull on her in such a manner.

"You call her traitor prematurely Huntress. As far as I know she has not yet been proven to be a traitor, in fact this gesture is a formality she is innocent by my standards. She will not be cuffed." Michelle spoke

"Spectre we are just doing our job. If you are correct and she is not a traitor then good, but Councilor Tevos ordered us to arrest Liara and take her. You have a problem take it up with her." The huntress said stepping forward and strapping a pair of blue-coated cuffs onto Liara's hands. Michelle moved to stop the huntress but was stopped by a barrier that sprung up from the Commandos behind the Huntress. The Commandos fell in line around Liara and two of them put their hands on Liara's shoulders before shoving her forward. A third hand from a Commando directly behind Liara pushed down on Liara's neck forcing her head to face the ground. The hand was gentle as they did not want to harm the young Asari.

"Shall we Spectre?" Irissa said holding her left arm out. Michelle followed behind the small group that was taking Liara to the Asari embassy.

-Asari Embassy-

The trip through the Presidium was uncomfortable as people stared at the Commandos. Several young children were herded away from Liara and others were forced to not look. Michelle overheard several people stating that Liara was a criminal, and it frustrated her greatly. So when they finally arrived at the Asari Embassy Michelle was ready to give the councilor a piece of her mind. She had come in prepared to yell at Tevos, but was calmed when Tevos immediately asked for forgiveness for the manner in which she had to bring Liara in.

The Asari Embassy was a beautiful chamber filled with vines growing up the walls. There were violet roses that seemed to glow casting the room in a violet light. Even the desk these roses growing on them.

"It is fine Councilor. I understand the need to show that you aren't giving preferential treatment to me just because of our families relationship." Liara said bending at the knee to kiss the councilors hand.

"I am sorry Liara. It came as a great shock to my family to hear of Benezia's betrayal. We had heard that she had emptied her estate of Commandos, but had assumed she was just moving to the estate on the Armali Coast. If we had been more aware we'd probably have stopped her from leaving." Tevos said

"It is fine councilor."

"Liara I need to know do you have any idea why Benezia would do something as terrible as this?"

"I do not know Councilor. I have been wracking my brain on it since we landed on the Citadel and I can find no evidence that would support something of this nature."

"Liara if you would allow it I'd like to meld with you and look into the memories of your mother."

"I can't Councilor. There are things there I do not wish to remember." Liara said quietly looking down.

"Liara. I can't sign off as you being innocent if I don't look. You understand this right?" Tevos said placing a hand on the young Asari's shoulder

"I do, but still I do not wish to remember."

"Then I am sorry, but you will have to be detained." Tevos said looking down at her feet in sadness. The Huntress stepped forward placing the cuffs back onto Liara's wrists.

"I- Can we do this in private Councilor?" Liara said looking back at Michelle who was staring angrily at the Huntress. For a moment Tevos looked shocked before noticing the look in Liara's eyes.

"Of course Little One. Spectre if you would wait outside I shall call you back when we are finished." Tevos said and Michelle nodded and made to leave, but not before taking a single look back at Liara who was still looking at the ground.

Michelle sat outside the Asari Embassy for almost an hour before she was called back in. When she stepped inside she found Liara curled up on the couch in the room shivering. Michelle stepped hurridly to the woman and placed a hand on the Asari's shoulder. It was only when she had placed the hand upon her shoulder did Michelle realize Liara wasn't shivering because she was cold, but was instead in tears. Anger bloomed in Michelle's heart and she turned pulling the pistol from her belt and pointing it at the Asari Councilor. The Huntress was on her feet in an instant her own gun pointing at the Spectre.

"What did you do to her?" Michelle shouted angrily

"I did nothing. The meld is taxing and can cause old feelings to bubble. Especially when it pertains to a singular person. It was not my plan to cause the Little One such pain, but I can now say without a doubt Liara T'Soni has no relation to Benezia's betrayal." Tevos said looking down at Liara sadly.

"What exactly is the meld?" Michelle asked her voice still stern, but the gun was lowered.

"It is something Asari can do, we can join with a person's very being. Depending on the type of meld one will experience different things, the meld Liara and I partook in was simply of information. She passed the memories of her mother onto me, and I gleamed the information of her innocence from those moments. No memory was held back." Tevos said drinking from a cup at her desk.

"I see. So Liara is ok?"

"No. She is in pain, but she'll be fine. It is surprising you care so much for her. All reports on you show that you don't associate with people often, and tend to be cold to all those who approach you. Why do you care for her?"

"It is my business why I care."

"I do not mean to push. Forgive me. If you do not mind I took the liberty of renting a hotel room for the Little One. Please take her there and look after her. She needs a lot of rest." Tevos said before turning to a screen at her desk. She slowly began typing. The Huntress stood and walked to the door. Michelle stepped to the crying Liara and pulled her into her arms. She placed one hand under Liara's knees and the other around her shoulder. Liara turned her face into the Commander's loose shirt and clung to it tightly. Tears dotted her clothes as the Huntress led them to a skycar that would take them to their hotel. Wrex was forced to return to the Normandy as the Skycar could not take his weight.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7:

On Thessia it was tradition for a mother and daughter to eat dinner every night. It was a custom passed down from a time when the Asari were located purely as small tribes and the community was their main focus during such times. It was not unheard of though for a mother to have more then thirty daughters, be it with multiple partners or a singular sire. When the Asari burst into the stars this practice fell apart as daughters would leave their mother's home in search of new life and new planets. When much of the galaxy was known the practice came about once more and instead the daughters would eat with the full family in a more nuclear setting as was expected from the other races doctrine.

It was for this reason that when Liara was ten she was eating dinner with her mother in their summer home on the shores of the Great Sea. The dining hall was a large gold detailed chamber. On the east wall there was a collection of windows that dotted the twelve foot walls of the chamber. At night the windows tinted slightly to cast an orange glow over the room. Upon the ceiling rested a chandelier that was made over thirteen Asari cycles ago. It was altered to house modern day lighting, but the core structure was never lost. The table the mother and daughter sat at was long and made of tinted glass, it would change color depending on the time of day one sat at it.

Liara, being a ten-year old Asari found it fascinating to make faces with her food, and was rather determined to eat using her fingers. This was a source of frustration for the Matriarch, as she was more accustomed to more civilized eating, and perhaps more then that it was similar to how her former bond-mate would eat certain foods. On this particular day the Matriarch's patience was already worn thin, and as such she was fit to bursting in anger. She held her anger as best she could until Liara's clumsy childish fingers caused the ornate china to fall off the table and break, spilling food all over the polished tiled floor. It wasn't the mess that upset the matriarch it was the wailing from her daughter, and in a fit of rage, much unlike her, Benezia stood and stepped to where Liara sat and raised a single hand. The hand crashed down upon her daughter causing the chair and the small child to tumble to the floor. Unknown to the matriarch at that moment the fall caused several shards of glass to cut into Liara's arms, these cuts would scar the young Asari for life.

"If you can't eat like a proper Asari, Liara then you won't eat at all." Benezia yelled over the screams of her child. Shiala, her caretaker came into the room and stood behind her mistress.

"Shiala take Liara to her room. See to it the cooks do not deliver her an evening snack." Benezia snapped before stepping around the table and returning to her own meal. Shiala stepped around to where Liara sat crying on the floor and lifted the child into her arms. The two departed from the room leaving several small dots of purple blood upon the tiled floor. Three maids entered the room shortly after Liara left and got to work cleaning the floor. This was the first time Benezia ever acted in anger to her young child, but from then on the incidents grew until Liara's mind was tortured by Benezia's words and actions.

-Hotel Room Presidium-

Getting into the private hotel room had been an interesting experience for Michelle. She was fully prepared to have to carry Liara through a crowded lobby and just pray no one noticed the two. As it was due to the privledges of being in the Asari councilor's private SkyCar they were allowed to stop at the balcony of their room. The only issue had been jumping from the SKyCar while holding Liara, she had stumbled slightly and nearly fallen to the floor. Luckily she caught herself and secured Liara in her arms. Throughout the transit Liara had held onto Michelle's armor.

Michelle had placed the young distraught Asari on the bed and at first had meant to leave her be, but the way the woman before her cried out made her change her mind. She stepped forward and laid down on the bed next to Liara. She pulled the Asari into her and rested a hand on the woman's crests. She bent down and whispered pleasantries that she had once been whispered when Amanda had comforted her.

It was unclear to Michelle just how long she had sat with Liara in her arms, but at one point she had drifted off and the fake sunlight of the presidium had been replaced by a nightsky. Peeling the Asari off was difficult as Liara seemed to be resolute in holding the Commander tight. Finally Michelle extracted herself from Liara's frantic embrace. The gesture resulted in Liara awakening. At first it seemed Liara was unaware of where she was, but realization dawned upon her and with a started yelp Liara was moving.

"Co-Commander." Liara shouted. She was mortified at the thought that this woman before her had seen her in such a state. She could feel the tears upon her cheeks, and with a sigh she whipped them from her face. What right did she have to cry before this woman who had been beaten down by the Galaxy's cruel hands? What right did she have to cry when the woman before her stood so strong having suffered more then Liara could even rationalize.

"Relax Liara. It's ok."

"No it's not ok Commander. I shouldn't have cried like this. It was unbecoming of me." Liara said

"Liara it's ok I promise."

Liara stared at the woman before her. Her back was so straight and her head was held high. Once again awe filled Liara's body. How did this woman stand so strong despite what Liara had found about her life. It was a thought that consumed Liara's mind and a desire filled her being. She needed to know how Michelle did it. Needed to know this woman before her. With staggered steps Liara moved to stand before the Commander. She raised a single hand to cup the porcelain cheek of the woman before her. She felt the way the Commander flinched at her touch, but did not pull away.

"Commander. I need to know. How do you do it? Mindoir, Elysium. You faced such tragedy and yet you are unconsumed by it." Liara mumbled

"You looked me up?" Michelle said surprised

"I was intrigued by you." Liara said not moving her hand from the Commander's cheek.

"You could have asked me."

"I must admit that I would have struggled to do such a thing. I do not do well in social circles. It is the reason I find solace in the quiet of a solo dig. Speech has always been something that I have struggled with. I tend to ramble needlessly, and then I- Oh Goddess I'm doing it right now aren't I?" Liara said quickly. She only realized her actions by seeing the way the Commander's face turned into a light smile.

"Yeah you kind of are. I can understand the love of quiet. I tend to retreat to a book. So you said you've been studying the Protheaen's for fifty years. How'd you come to that decision? I mean wouldn't you rather be dancing in some club, or becoming a mercenary?"

"I am a T'Soni, mercenary life is below me. I am much better then some Asari who'd rather spend her time shaking her backside in some club. I do not need the money, I am above such trivial notions as that. I will not waste my time in a club, or as a mercenary. I-" Liara said quickly her mother's lectures coming to mind. She could almost feel the crop hitting her face when she stumbled through the words. She could feel her mother's piercing gaze upon her and she felt herself lose herself to fear. A hand on her shoulder shook her from her reverie and she stared into the worried eyes of her Commander.

"You ok Liara? You stopped talking all of a sudden." Michelle said genuinely worried. She had seen the frantic look in Liara's eyes as she spoke. The way she recoiled when she had moved to touch the Asari put anger in the Commander's heart. She found herself hating Matriarch Benezia for the scars she put upon the Asari before her.

"I am fine Commander." Liara said tersely. She cursed herself for slipping again and showing her weakness to the woman before her. She turned away form the Commander, removing her hand from the warm cheek and turned to the cold night view before her.  
"Commander am I to be left here when you leave to go after Saren and my mother?"

"No, you will be coming with us." Michelle said surprising Liara. For a moment Liara turned back to where the Commander stood, but she looked back over the Presidium.

"I see."

"You know you will have to face your mother at some point if you come with us right? I mean it is unlikely we won't bump heads with both her and Saren at least once or twice." Michelle said stepping next to Liara.

"I am aware."

"Will you be ok?"

"I will manage to do what it takes if that is what you mean." Liara said coldly

"Liara. We are talking about you having to help me kill your mother. Are you truly ok with that?"

"Do not mistake me Commander. Benezia is my mother in name, but she has never acted like one to me. I will feel no pain if our paths shall cross and her life must end." Liara said not looking at the Commander, tears streaked unbidden down the Asari's face. Michelle wanted to press it, tell her that it was unlikely she wouldn't feel anything upon seeing her mother. She wanted to wipe the tears from the Asari's eyes, but her hand felt weak. The pair stood in silence, one crying silently, and the other praying she could find the strength to comfort her companion.

-Docking Bay-

Liara and Michelle made their way through the Presidium to the Docking Bay that housed the Normandy in silence. It was upon arriving at the Docking Bay that things changed, there was some commotion directly outside the Normandy. There was an Systems Alliance Marine speaking tersely with a group of C-Sec.  
"She isn't going to hurt anyone. Please let's just get her to calm down." The Systems Alliance Marine said. Michelle stepped closer and saw the man was a lieutenant.  
"I am sorry, but she is causing a disturbance and she must be detained or put down." The C-Sec officer said

"What exactly is going on here?" Michelle demanded stepping beside the lieutenant. Liara stood behind the Commander her head facing downward and hands behind her back. There was silence as the pair took in the new arrivals before the Lieutenant found his voice.

"Ah, Commander. There is a situation. Early this morning a Batarian vessel crashed into the Docking Bay here. At first no one left the vessel, until a single woman escaped. C-Sec rushed to the scene and the woman acted in fear and hid. I was then called, as the woman was human and I am the acting psychiatrist for humans on the Citadel. I managed to get that the woman was from Mindoir, but after that nothing. She is making a scene and C-sec wishes to take over the situation. She's currently hiding behind the crate over there." The Lieutenant said pointing

"Di-did you say Mindoir?" Michelle stuttered.

"Yes, it's a small planet that houses one of more successful colonies. Seven years back it housed a rather large number of citizens, but-"

"I am well aware of what happened on Mindoir lieutenant. I was there. I'll go talk to her."

"Here take this, it's a drug that should calm her down. I was unable to get close enough to administer the drug. She made to point the gun she stole at me. I stepped away so that we didn't have a scene." The lieutenant said holding out a small needle housing a purple liquid

"We have a sniper that will take the woman down should she act out again." The C-sec Turian said gruffly.

"Do not shoot the woman officer." Michelle said angrily

"I will do what it takes to secure this bay. Commander." The Turian spat before stepping away. Michelle and Liara stepped away from the pair and turned to the crate that the woman hid behind.  
"Are you going to be ok Commander?"

"I'll manage. Wait here. Extra faces may scare her." Michelle said and she breathed deep to steady her beating heart. She closed her eyes and stepped forward around the crate. Her eyes opened to be staring into the black eyes and hair of Jamie. She only recognized Jamie, because of her eyes, despite how broken they were, they were definitely Jamie's. She saw those eyes every time she fell asleep. The Jamie before was skinny, and her face was so thin. Her body was so frail, and her hair was wild. Her eyes were so frantic and scared. Michelle wanted to step forward and throw her friend into a hug and protect her.  
"Who are you? Get back! I'll-"

"Pl-please calm down. I don't want to hurt you. I want to help." Michelle said her heart breaking at her friend's words

"Can't help. She can't be helped."

"I can help. I was on Mindoir." Michelle said trying to calm the woman  
"Why? Why aren't you like she is!" Jamie shouted

"Cause of you. You saved me. Do you not remember?"

"She-"

"Do you know your name?"

"Her name is slut, toy, bitch, or whore. Whichever name the master's wish for her to have". Jamie whispered, and Michelle felt her hate bubble.

"Your name is Jamie. You saved me seven years ago."

"Jamie-"

"Yes Jamie. You wanted to be a soldier one day."

"She did?"

"Yes you did, I laughed at you when you said that. I always knew you could do it. You were stronger then me. If things had worked out better, then maybe you'd be the Commander and I'd be waiting on Mindoir to hear stories of your travels."

"Michelle?" Jamie said her eyes wide in recognition. Michelle felt her face crack into a grin as Jamie jumped forward to hug her. Her arms opened to welcome Jamie into her arms. A single shot barked through the docking bay and Michelle felt rather then saw the bullet that ended Jamie's life. Her world came crashing down as her first friend's blood sprayed upon her body.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8:

 _Michelle ran through the tunnels of the Mindoir colony clasped tight in her arms was her rifle, she was supposed to practice tonight with it. Her silent feet slid across the dirt as she ducked under a pair of men carrying a crate that would be sent to the ship that was landing. She smiled as she saw the young girl in the distance. A porcelain hand raised to wave at the girl and the girl took off towards Michelle. They met in a clash of a hug and black hair mixed with red for a moment as they held one another. Michelle pulled from the hug and held the hand of the girl before her. With a tug she took off towards the shooting range dragging her friend with her._

 _"Michelle slow down!" The sixteen-year old girl shouted_

 _"Oh come on Jamie! Its my practice day lets go!" Michelle said. The pair bounded through residential tunnels before coming to an open field it was encased in a glass shell providing a view of the world beyond. The floor was painted the blue-white color of the snow on Mindoir. In the distance were small targets that she was supposed to aim at. Around the pair there where several other children practicing either with pistols or with a rifles. Jamie's hand slipped from hers as she climbed up to one of the empty perches. Michelle followed her closely. At the top Michelle laid down and brought the scope to her eye._

 _"Breathe, Michelle. Carefully line up the target. Wait Breathe again and then fire." Jamie's voice sounded out and Michelle followed the instruction. She fired and the shot sounded out into the ground. A small display on the sniper rifle showed Jamie the miss._

 _"Don't allow the rifle to move as you breathe."_

 _"How?"_

 _"Come on you were taught how to breathe using your diaphragm as the focus. Do it. That'll stop your chest from moving to much and keep your shot steady." Jamie said and slowly Michelle breathed as she lined up the shot. She breathed once more and fired. The target shot back to stimulate the target's death. The machinery around each target pulled the target board down before ejecting a new one._

 _"Much better. Again." Jamie said and Michelle aimed the shot. Right as her finger tightened Jamie spoke up_

 _"I'm thinking about joining the Alliance when I'm eighteen." The shot went wide as Michelle's eyes shot to Jamie._

 _"What!" She screamed._

 _"Don't lose your focus. On a hunt there are distractions. Now focus."_

 _"So that was just a joke?" Michelle said as she aimed the shot again._

 _"No, I'm being honest. I want to go help the Alliance."_

 _"But you could be killed!"_

 _"We're in peace times, I'll probably be on desk duty. And even if I'm sent out to deal with mercenaries I'll sign up as an infiltrator so all I'll be doing is sniping while under a cloak. Fire." Jamie said and Michelle lined up the shot. Her fingers shook as her mind processed everything that was being said. She pulled the trigger and again the shot went wide._

 _"Focus Michelle!" Jamie raised her voice._

 _"I'm sorry. It's just you're telling me you're leaving me."_

 _"Hey, that's not true. I will always come back to see you. Heck you could also sign up and we could do basic together."_

 _"That's funny. I'm not cut out for the military. You know that. I could never kill something that could talk to me. I don't even like the idea of killing for the colony."_

 _"Yeah I suppose you're right. Fine whenever I can come back I will. I'll tell you all my stories. And one day when I'm a Captain of my own ship I'll come back and take you around the galaxy and show you everything." Jamie said._

 _"Promise?" Michelle said looking up_

 _"I promise you with all that I am." Jamie said a smile on her face. Michelle turned back to her rifle and fired another shot._

Blood filled her vision. There was so much blood. That smile was still on Jamie's face. Blood filled her vision. Someone was touching her, she turned to see someone blue standing before her. So blue, like the snow on Mindoir. Blood filled her vision. Jamie's smile was all she could see. Those lifeless eyes staring back at her. Blood filled her vision. Someone was wiping her face. A blue hand.

Blood filled her vision. Someone was talking to her. Pulling on her. Pulling her away from Jamie. Michelle fought away and bent to where Jamie was. Blood filled her friend's face. Blood pooled around her knees. Jamie was dead. She lowered her face to the dirty rags Jamie wore. Blood was on those rags. She buried her face in those rags. Crying silently.

Blood filled her vision. Someone was pulling on her. Pulling her away. Blue skin was infront of her shielding her from her friend. Again someone was cleaning her face. Whispering to her. Blood filled her vision. There was so much talking now. Everyone was so loud. Blood filled her vision. She was being pulled away. Someone was holding her. She shuddered as her vision cleared and she could see Liara staring at her. Tears were falling from her face, but she could not care. Liara was gently wiping her face. There was someone behind her bent over and lifting Jamie into his arms. She turned to look at her friend, but Liara stood in front of prohibiting her vision. Liara's hand fisted into her hair pushing Michelle's face into the white and green science uniform she wore.

White filled her vision as she cried silently into Liara's shoulder. Liara was saying something, but she couldn't hear anything. She was being walked forward up the ramp into the Normandy airlock. Liara was shouting now, but not at her. The door to the Normandy was opened and Michelle tried to collect herself so that her crew did not see her cry, but she faltered and cried openly on the command deck of the Normandy. Liara led her down the stairs into her room. Liara's pulled her onto the bed and held her tight as she cried.

-Citadel earlier-

Liara watched as Michelle went to the survivor from Mindoir. Her muscles tightened as she saw Michelle's eyes widen. She made to move, but then Michelle smiled. She smiled a smile like the one in the picture in the Commander's room. It was so beautiful in person. Liara felt her heart beat faster as she saw the smile. A part of her wished Michelle would smile a smile like that at her. So distracted by her thoughts she was unaware that the survivor was moving forward. She was pulled from her thoughts as a shot barked out through the Docking Bay. Her eyes shot to Michelle, and saw the survivor falling. Blood was pouring out onto Michelle and onto the floor below. A chunk of the woman's face was blown off by the shot. Brain matter was expelled behind her. Liara moved forward quickly. She placed a hand on Michelle, trying to get the woman's attention. Michelle turned to look at Liara, but her eyes did not see her. Blood was covering Michelle's face. Liara pulled a napkin she kept in her pocket and rubbed it on Michelle's face gently. She wiped the blood away.

"Michelle. Come back to me. It's ok. It's ok. Everything is ok. I'm here for you." Liara whispered. She could hear shouting from the C-Sec officers as they moved around her.  
"Everyone Shut up!" Liara yelled shocking the C-Sec officers.  
"Why did you shoot. She wasn't moving to harm the Commander." The man they had spoken to before said. Liara tuned them out as Michelle pulled from her. She watched Michelle bend down and place her head in the bloody rags of the poor woman before them. Liara bent down behind Michelle and placed a hand around her waist. She pulled the Commander to her feet. She turned Michelle around and covered her face from the woman behind her. She wiped the blood away as best she could while holding an arm around Michelle's waist. Michelle tried to look away, but Liara would not allow her to see. Liara sighed as she pulled Michelle into her chest. Her heart ached as she felt tears wet her suit.

Liara turned them around and began to walk to the Normandy.

"It's ok. I'm just going to get you to your room, everything is ok." Liara said. The door to the airlock opened and they stepped inside.  
"Joker!" Liara shouted.

"Yes? Liara? What's going on out there? We heard a shot." Joker's voice came through the ships P.A. system.

"Call everyone out of the Command Deck and the mess hall. I need to get there without anyone seeing me."

"I can't do that Liara. Only the Commander can order that"  
"Damnit Joker! Just do it. The Commander told me to tell you that." Liara yelled

"Li-"

"Please Joker."

"Fine. All Crew Report to the hangar." Joker shouted and Liara sighed deeply. The door opened behind her after a short delay. Liara pulled on Michelle again and they got moving. She pulled Michelle threw the empty Command Deck, and for a moment she looked at the CockPit and saw Joker staring at her. His mouth opened and he reached to the two crutches at his side. Liara shook her head and continued to drag Michelle through the deck. She brought the Commander to her room and sat down. She pulled Michelle over her and placed her head over Michelle's she mirrored the way Shiala used to hold her when she was scared. She wrapped her legs and arms around Michelle and held her close. She put her lips on Jamie's forehead and held her as she cried.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Sorry about the delay. I hope this chapter is atleast a good make up for the delay. I have a lot of plans for what's going to happen so updates should be faster now. I have up to changed end of ME1 planned (Plus a little extra). In other news this chapter is sort of a reprieve from the over whelming depressing chapters I've had so far.

Chapter 9:

The morning was an odd one for Michelle, she had slept a full night without waking from her screams. She had nightmares that tormented her but she could faintly remember something blue coming forward and ending the nightmares. Her eyes opened slowly and calmly only to be met with blue skin. Her eyes widened and she pulled back out of the tight embrace she was in. Her vision swam for a moment as she looked upon the sleeping face of Liara T'Soni. Her heart beat faster as she could only marvel in the gentle face of the Asari. If Michelle was of a rational mind she may have noticed the heat blooming in her body, but she was not and she made a dash to the small private shower of the Commander's chamber.

She hid behind the door and allowed herself to panic slightly. Her heart was beating so fast, it hurt. Why was it beating so fast? Gods it hurt. There was a gentle groan from the room and Michelle became aware that Liara was awake.

"Commander?" Liara's voice shot through the chamber. In an urge to not have to confront the Asari, or rather to not confront the fact her heart was beating abnormally fast Michelle turned on the shower. She stripped herself of her suit and prayed Liara would get the message.

-Liara-

Liara listened to the sound of running water for a bit. Heat was blooming on her face she acutely aware that on the other side of the door was a naked Michelle Shepard. The images from the extranet search came unbidden to her mind. She entertained the thought of opening the door and feasting her eyes upon the woman before her for much longer then she'd be proud to say. With a shake of her head Liara moved out the door.

Shame filled her body as she stepped into the mess hall that was directly next to the Commander's Chambers. Every member of the ground crew, except the injured Tali'zorah, was there staring at her. Her face turned purple as her embarrassment grew. A part of her wanted to run back into the Commander's Chamber, but she knew that'd only make the situation worse. With a sigh Liara made her way to where the mess sergeant was.

"Can I get some food?"

"Sorry we're out." The man replied and Liara's eyes narrowed as she stared at the full containers beside the man.

"What about those?" Liara said pointing to the food beside the sergeant.

"That's for the crew." The man said

"I'm part of the crew." Liara said calmly.

"I haven't been notified that you were. Until I am no food." The man insisted. Liara felt her embarrassment growing as she knew everyone was still looking at her.

"Hey Bacher, get me some food please." A voice from behind her said. She found herself looking at the crutches of Joker as he settled himself at the bar in front of the Mess sergeant.

"Of course Joker." Bacher said pleasantly. He scooped a generous portion of scrambled eggs onto a plate before placing several pieces of bacon on the side.

"Hey this isn't the regular crap." Joker said as he grabbed the meal.

"Yeah well I made a little run to some stores on the Presidium. Got us some decent food." Bacher said. Liara sighed as she pulled away from the bar. A hand from Joker stopped her. She turned back to him.

"Here take this." Joker said holding the food out to her.

"Joker I can't." Liara said

"Damn right she can't. She's not part of the crew." Bacher yelled.

"Just give her some damn food. You and I know she's part of the crew." Joker said

"I'm not feeding a fucking alien. Especially not one of the fucking whore-asari" Bacher said

"What was that? What did you just call me?" Liara's voice rose. Her anger was getting the better of her as her biotics rippled around her.

"You heard me bitch." Bacher said and Liara stepped closer to the bar she made to attack the sergeant, but suddenly the man was falling to the floor. A plate was broken and blood was gushing from a wound to the man's face. Liara's eyes shot to the table where Garrus Vakarian stood with his hand out. Ashley was seated next to him shocked as a piece of egg fell off her fork.

"What the fuck Turian? I was enjoying that." Ashley's voice rose in annoyance.

"I wanted the man to shut up."

"Eh fuck it, he was getting on my nerves too. I'll just get more. Someone should probably call Chakwas though." Ashley said standing and walking to where the mess sergeant's body was laying unconscious. She grabbed two extra plates and served the two plates with a rather generous portion of both eggs and bacon. She reached forward placing the food before Joker.

"Well Asari, you going to take the food from Joker or not?" Ashley said her eyes narrowing. Liara blushed as she took the food from Joker. She offered her thanks to Joker to which he just waved her off and went to eating his meal. She then made her way to where Garrus was fiddling with a small tube. She sat next to him.

"Thank you Garrus."

"Don't mention." Garrus said before his talons tore into the tube and a green paste slipped onto his talons.

"Spirits, must they make these things to be so difficult to open?" Garrus said before raising his talons to his mouth and slipping the paste into his mouth.

"Well I was hungry, but that looks absolutely disgusting." Ashley said sitting down next to Miranda who was staring down at a datapad in her hands.

"Turian Military emergency ration. Not supposed to be delicious to taste, but it gets the job done. Tsk should have gotten food on the Presidium as well. Though the bastard probably wouldn't let me cook food for myself." Garrus mumbled.

"What bastard? Why is Chakwas pulling Mess Sergeant Bacher onto a stretcher?" A voice from behind Liara shocked her, causing her to fling the egg she was getting onto her fork across the table. Unfortunately for Liara it landed in the open top of Miranda who had just put her datapad down.

"That some kind of Asari greeting? Cause if it is I'd appreciate it if you don't do it again." Miranda said reaching down to where the egg was nestled between her breasts. The action drew the attention of Kaiden who's eyes widened slightly as Miranda raised the egg to her lips.

"Seriously? Kaiden. Staring. Again." Ashley ground out.

"Sorry." Kaiden said looking down at his own meal.

"Is anyone going to answer the question?" Michelle said stepping over to get her own food.

"Bacher was being an ass. So Garrus clocked him with a plate." Joker said his mouth full. A chunk of egg slipped out of his mouth and fell onto the plate before him.

"Gross." Miranda mumbled.

"Wait what? Garrus? Don't hit the crew with plates." Michelle said shaking her head.

"I expect you to apologize to him." Michelle continued.

"Eh he deserved the hit Commander. He called Liara a whore." Joker said after swallowing his mouthful.

"What?" Michelle's voice raised

"It is fine Commander." Liara said quietly.

"Yes yes it's all taken care of. Now Commander where are we headed?" Joker said grabbing his crutches and making his way back towards the stairs.

"Noveria. The council sent me a message stating they had reason to believe Matriarch Benezia was there. Get us there double time Joker. I don't want to fucking miss this chance." Michelle said. Liara's eyes widened and she felt sweat gather on her hands. They were going to confront her Benezia. They were going to kill her mother. She swallowed her food and dried her hands as her thought whirled in her mind.

"Aye Commander." Joker said and he disappeared into the stairwell

"Commander. Can I go down with you to Noveria?" Liara asked quietly.

"Why? Want to help dear mommy?" Ashley said condescendingly.

"No I want to put a bullet in her head." Liara said coldly. Ashley's eyes widened she pushed away from the table.

"Dr. T'Soni I expect all of the ground crew to be a part of this mission. So yes you will be there." Michelle said sitting down beside Liara. Liara stood and turned to where the elevator was.

"Where are you going?" Kaiden asked. Liara stopped and turned to Kaiden. Her eyes cold and her biotics were flaring intermittently. Her hands clenched and unclenched.

"I'm aware this ship has a small firing range. I plan to be there and work on my aim." Liara said before entering the elevator. Michelle kept her eyes on the elevator as she ate. She prayed Liara would reappear and her gentle face would be back. She hated seeing the anger that was set upon the Asari's face. She wanted to ease the pain on her friend's face, but she found herself incapable of doing so. She was more concerned with the fact that all she wanted to do was kill Benezia herself. She was already planning several ways for her to do such a thing and each was more gruesome then the last. She was so caught up in her thoughts that she didn't notice that she had cleaned her plate of eggs. Luckily for her the ground crew had slipped aware while she ate. She sighed as she stood and deposited her plate at the sink. Her eyes shifted to where Tali'Zorah's clean room sat. A thought came to her mind, how many more people were going to be hurt in this mission? How many were going to die? She shook her head to clear those thoughts from her mind. Instead she turned to the elevator. An urge to check on Liara overwhelmed her and she stepped forward.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: A part of this chapter focuses heavily on Ashley. I ended up cutting a lot from this chapter. I had a lot of little details about the mission to where Benezia is in ME1. But it was superfluous in the end. I didn't end up changing much except for a few scenes. I actually got so sad in this chapter. Honestly writing some of these chapters tears at me and hurts. I don't like the sadness in this story, but it works for what my Shepard. Now I'm going to state that it won't be this sad for long. (There'll be a lot of happiness soon) I won't do a lot of the side missions, but instead you'll get a lot of shore leave chapters with Liara and FemShep fluff. For the end scene in this I suggest listening to Careful by Michelle Featherstone. It's what I used to write the scene, and I think it defines Liara and Michelle's relationships in this story.

Chapter 10: Noveria

The Elevator trip was short and silent as Michelle's thoughts raged in her mind. She stepped onto the crew deck. She nodded to the medical staff that was trading shifts as they continued their work on the injured Tali. As she neared the firing rangeshe could hear the shots. The door opened and she was met with Liara holding a single pistol in her hands. Liara turned to look at her as the sound of the door opening was loud enough that the average person could hear it over the sound of gun fire.  
"Coming to check on me Commander? There is no need. I'm fine."

"Liara you just said you wanted to kill your mother. That is not fine."

"Commander. You saw me after what happened with the Asari Councilor, it should be obvious that I hold no love for my mother. She may have birthed me, but it was the head Commando that raised me. Shiala deserves the title of my mother not Benezia." Liara said firmly before turning back to the firing range. Michelle stared in shock and wanted to speak up, and say how it can't be that simple, but she found herself struggling to do so. With a shake of her head Michelle settled herself beside Liara and pulled one of the practice pistols from its holster. She may be unable to voice her concerns, but she could at the very least make sure Liara was not alone.

-Ten hours later Female crew chambers-

Ashley sighed as she slid the tight crew pants down her waist. It had been a less then desirable day on the Normandy as several crew members were up in arms about the Turian's strike against the mess chief. It wasn't until the Commander had come up from whatever she was doing with the Asari to settle the problem that the crew finally let up. As it was Ashley's day had rightly gone to hell in a hand basket as that Mercenary bitch had spent a good portion of her day talking with her. In the end Ashley had acquiesced to the presence of the mercenary and had even carried a conversation. Surprisingly she didn't find it to be the worst thing ever. She groaned in relief as she stripped the white bra and panties off of her and slipped into the warm water of the shower. Beside her she could see the dark hair of Natasha Romanov.

"Hey Tasha?" Ashley said not fully realizing the shortening of the name.

"Tasha? That's new." The beauty behind her turned to her opening an eye to look at her.

"Shut up. You really think the Asari is being honest about hating her mother? I mean you said it yourself the Asari tend to put a lot of blind faith in their Matriarchs. Benezia is a Matriarch, and is the Doctor's mother what's to say she isn't stringing the Commander along with fanciful tales about how mean her mommy was. What if she really is working for her?"

"She truly hates her mother."

"How can you be sure?"

"It's in her eyes. She looks so haunted when she speaks of her mother. Look I'm sure your mother was an absolute sweetheart and your father was your superman. I'm sure you've heard about parents who beat their kids, abuse them, and I'm sure you can't even fathom why someone could do that."

"It's just I can't see someone wanting to kill their parent."

"I'd kill my father if I had the chance." She responded turning the water off on her shower.  
"Not what you were expecting? Face it girlie. You need to wake up." She continued before wrapping a towel around her frame and leaving. Ashley stared for a moment at her retreating frame before she too turned the water off and prepared for sleep. She stepped into the Female crew chamber only to see the asari stepping into the room. Their eyes met and for a moment Ashley thought of her little sister standing before her. With a shake of her head Ashley made her way to her bunk and tried to sleep, but she was plagued by the thought of her mother hurting her little sisters and what she'd do if that was the case.

-Comm room orbit of Noveria-

The ground crew sat as Michelle spoke about the plans for the assault, their eyes scouring the mission parameters and the layout of the planet. Michelle had used her influence as a Spectre to get a detailed layout. Michelle's eyes shot to Liara before she spoke once more.

"The only unknown is exactly what Matriarch Benezia may be capable of. We know her to be a strong biotic, but that's it. Liara? Perhaps you could enlighten us?" Michelle said and all eyes shot to Liara. For a moment Liara stared in shock before she stood. She clenched her hands before speaking.

"Matriarch Benezia never trained my in biotics so I can not say just how strong she is, but from what my trainer said she is immensely powerful. All T'Soni's are taught how to use a Statis, and Benezia's statis may be one of the most powerful. From what my Trainer told me Benezia is capable of locking down multiple targets with it. Now she is not able to enjoy those captured by this, but it can still be devastating. In the end the only hope we have with her is that she can't hold Wrex down for to long. If he and whoever remains not captured by her statis can distract her long enough her statis will shatter and the rest of us can take her down."

"Distract her? I don't do distractions Asari." Wrex growled out.

"When I say distract I mean either killing her outright or hitting her hard enough to knock her out." Liara said before sitting down

-Noveria Rachni Queen chamber-

The ground team stumbled into the room as the last of the Asari commandos was taken down. Their eyes shot to the sole Asari standing infront of a large glass tube. Inside the tube was the queen of the Rachni, an insect like species that once brought the galaxy to its knees until the Krogan were uplifted to take them down. The Asari standing there was dressed in black leather that covered all of its skin until it turned revealing a purple face and green eyes. For a moment Liara faltered before she stuttered out.

"Shiala?"

"I will not have you stop him. Saren's work can not be stopped. He shall herald in glory." Shiala said before her hand glowed with biotics as the ground team moved forward. Liara remained back and it was this act that saved her from being caught in the statis.

"Why are you doing this Shiala?" Liara asked as she raised her own pistol. Her hand faltered and Shiala capitalized on the inaction. Her biotics glowed once more and Liara was sent tumbling into the metal bannisters.

"My mind is filled with Saren's light. I-i-. Liara. Listen to me. I- don't have long. I can't fight him off for long."  
"What are you talking about? Shiala what's wrong?"

"It's something on that ship of his. Saren. It makes you slowly come to want to please him, make him happy, do as he wishes. We fought against it for as long as we could but we fell. Benezia is the only one who managed to escape. We don't know where she went, but we know he looks for her. Look Liara Saren. He's looking for something, Some conduit. He thinks it is somewhere beyond the Mu Relay. I took the information of where that relay was from the Rachni Queen. I was not gentle. I inscribed the information on this." Shiala said reaching into a pocket on her suit and tossing a small pad to Liara who caught it and slipped it into her own pocket. Shiala groaned loudly before reaching to her head.

"Shiala?"

"I can feel his fingers on my back, his lips are at my ears. Liara. I'm sorry. Die." Shiala mumbled before her biotics flared and she sent the spiraling ball of energy out at Liara. Liara raised a barrier barely in time and it shielded much of the damage, but Liara was still sent back into the railing. Liara jumped forward her biotics glowing and grim resolution on her face. If Shiala was truly gone then it'd be a kindness to end her life. Her biotics glowed as she sent a small needle out at Shiala. Shiala swatted it away, but the small attack served its purpose as Liara entered into Shiala's arm reach. Her hand flashed out grabbing at her former trainer's throat. For a moment her hand found purchase before a bioticly enhanced fist collided with her stomach. Her barrier gave way and the fist broke through the thin layer of her armor. Luckily for her the armor did not puncture skin but it burst apart outwards allowing the cold to nip at Liara's exposed stomach. Liara spat spittle as she was sent tumbling backward from the punch. She stumbled down the steps and Shiala followed after her. Shiala's hand found her throat and Liara struggled. Tears welled in her eyes as she saw her end coming by the one she loved the most. IN the corner of her eye she saw Michelle Shepard staring at her in shock. She could see the muscles in the human flexing as she fought the statis holding her in place. Liara reached up finding her trainers face. She pushed past the darkness closing in and pushed to where the soft flesh of the Asari's eye lid was. She pulled on her biotics and sent a wave into one of the Asari's eyes. Purple blood sprayed down upon Liara and a shriek pierced the air. All at once the statis holding the ground team ended. As Liara struggled to breathe she heard gunfire and watched as the form of her friend, her trainer, her confidant rocked as bullets entered her skin. More blood poured down upon Liara and then everything stopped. Shiala collapsed on top of Liara.

"Shiala?"

"Your father would be so proud of you. –cough- She is still alive you know. –cough- Her name-." Shiala mumbled as eyes grew dark and death claimed her.

-Normandy-

No one spoke as they entered the ship. All eyes remained on the quietly crying Liara as she made her way through the ship. Michelle followed until they neared her chambers. She pulled Liara into her quarters and held her close as tears overcame her.

"Liara." Michelle said as the tears came to and end. Liara looked up and their eyes met.  
"I've got you. It's going to be ok." Michelle continued. Liara just stared until she lunged forward. Lips met and Michelle's eyes widened. For a moment she thought about pushing Liara away before she found herself wrapping her arms around the Asari before her. She felt a wet appendage force itself into her mouth before she was assaulted with a sweet taste. Salt was also present in the kiss as Liara's tears had pooled into the kiss, but Michelle found herself uncaring. She wasn't fully aware of what was going on, but her heart beat faster. She felt something akin to how she felt around Amanda, but this feeling made what she felt for Amanda feel so small.


End file.
